I am not quite sure where my "people pleasing" type of personality came from. Maybe it was birthed out of low self esteem and low self worth as a younger person. Whatever the reason, I, at 42 years old know that it is OK to say yes to me and make choices that I feel are best for me. For too long I found myself not wanting to disappoint someone or 'let someone down" by really saying or doing what I felt in my heart was best for me. You know you are a people pleas er when you find yourself waving back and forth over choices and decisions before setting on one. I believe it is perfectly normal and wise to weigh all your options, but it is not okay to base your final choice on how someone else will perceive you.
Whenever I choose to walk in people pleasing and make a decision that only makes the other person or persons happy, I have no peace and end up miserable. The bottom line is when we are walking in people pleasing, we are not being people of integrity and honesty. I had a life changing thought two weeks ago.... I must live a life of truth to myself and to others. When I make choices solely so someone will feel happy or "proud"of me, I am being a liar to myself. Why has it been so hard for me to tell some people, "NO, that does not work for me?" I know the answer to that and will share it with you in the next blog. But what I want you to do before I give you my response is to search yourselves, and if you too suffer from "people pleasing," why do you think you do this? All of our reasons may be different and only you can answer that. Hopefully this will create a dialogue and you can share your reasons, thus each of us helping one another.
So the take away is simply, are you being true to you?
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